procrastination again...

I should be making flash cards for my Intro to Law midterm...but I wrote a poem instead. It is about half an hour old, so it hasn't been edited and prettied up. Honestly, I needed the poetry. We had an activity in class that required standing in front of the class, speaking and answering questions. My anxiety levels were very high maybe a 6-7. I read a bit of Bukowski to calm down as he is what I had on hand, and he is well good.

I really should make those flash cards, so I think the next few hours will be dedicated to writing or reading poems...

new poem (nice title huh)

I am a woman so I should
write about my uterus
or my vagina
or my vulva if you want to be correct
some body part that isn’t a man’s
because that is my unique world view.

I could write about birthing children
or things my children do
or don’t do
because they came out of my uterus, cervix, and vagina
or vulva if you want to hyper correct.

I could write about love and men,
or women
but only if there are romantic and sexual tones,
(think of your uterus and vagina,
not vulva, it isn’t a sexy word)
because editors and publishers
don’t want to read about sisterhood
it isn’t the 1970’s you know.
And I am not black
so “sista” hood
isn’t in my world view

(I am brown
and that open a few
more possibilities)

And even if you manage to write like a poem like a man
your vagina, no vulva, it’s academia
will find its way into the poem .
When a professor points to your name and sex
“How does her world view as a woman shape the themes of this poem?”

Because of my inability to focus on one thing....

I decided to blog again. I have found the surefire cure of my writer's block, take up a non-writing project. As a general rule I can never be completely happy with my current state. I haven't decided if it is due to my decisive wandering mind or the need to have some sort of equilibrium, like taking math and science courses while perusing a writing degree. Currently I am getting a paralegal degree, as an average salary of 30,000-40,000 a year v. a few subscriptions or issue of literary magazines sounds nice, yes I am a sell out, sort of. I do plan on Wallace Stevens-ing it (name drop!) and writing poems during the glamorous law career. So besides food and shelter I like to think a good chunk of my future paralegal pay will go to contest/reading fees, conferences, and work-shops.**justification end**

However, while my entire focus should be on the mighty law, I find myself daydreaming about Nano, short stories and poetry. So much that instead of working on my case brief on Rowe v. Maryland (a nice giggle the court references a prior case Crooks v. State) I am blogging about creative writing.

Here is the start of a new poem or poems, as it is very much in the air if there are two separate poems (okay that took a crazy amount of time to type up due to typos since I have Brandy you're a fine girl stuck in my head...holy stream of consciousness writing Batman...told you I had trouble focusing...)


My mother never left the homeland
new Filipino islands formed
wherever her tiny, but not delicate, feet landed
in the soft American soil.
We shaped this American west
with our bent backs
and built the manifest destiny.
Kicked out when the white Okies
moved out to the California west.
Our short stature no longer needed,
a stature that kept us low to the ground
in fields of artichokes.
Kicked out not only of the jobs we held, and did well,
but of the United States’ holding.